Recently a love-bug injected in me a strange bacteria, making me desirous of marriage.
I’m looking for a girl who is patient and has knowledge of all ills and pills, is religious minded and keeps away from all sins be it anasin, metasin or crosin. I promise to be a good doctor with no side effects. Apply or reply.

Wanted a Girl with a Lovely Look & Feel, Good GUI with Security features (privileges only for the Specific User especially critical Functionalities). There must not be any Critical or Medium Bug in her. Low Bugs can be deferred But needs to B fixed by the Next Build. She must not be PLATFORM INDEPENDENT, USER FRIENDLY. We are ready to Test the Application & CERTIFY the product but we will assure it will never be released to ANY OTHER Customer.
Allah ke nam pe koi ek biwi de de, Doosre ki nahi to apni hi de de, Allah tujhe ek ke badle do dega, Hillary hogi to Monika bhi dega

I hereby beg to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of husband after marriage. The person whom I’m looking for should be strictly a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl. The girl should be willing to surrender to the service and jurisdiction of My Lord i.e. . Myself. Any objection would be overruled and will not be sustained. Apply in confidence and if you have the confidence.

Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.
Badi muddat ke baad ek arzoo jaagi hai, Ki hum bhi shadi shuda ho jaye, Kya vajah shadi karane ki jo kahde sahi sahi, To yaaron ab khud se kaam ghar ka hota nahi.

Wanted a girl. Girl’s father should preferably have a soda factory. I am an occasional alcoholic who drinks only when friends come home. Friends come home only seven times a week. Girl preferred will carry me from bar to ghar-bar. Meet personally or send soda for trial. Sample should be ample.

Wanted a sturdy wife. Should be in working condition. Should be above average and must run the household at a good average.** ** *
*And Finally, A Chartered Accountant*
*Wanted a wife with tallied interests. Fixed Assets should be in a working Condition, not subject to depreciation. Enough long term cash liquidity is highly appreciated. Past related party disclosures is required. Inventory must be valued at present realizable value & not at historical cost. *
*Should be able to discount any contingent liabilities in future husband. Interested person please apply at…………. *


Mutual Funds

If there are 800 stocks in the BSE (and 30 blue chips which represent BSE, 50 which represent the Nifty and only 100 in the A category) there are more than a 1000 financial schemes which help me pick that one stock which will pay off for my child’s education.
Simple statistics tell me that I am many times more likely to pick the best stock rather the pick the best mutual fund/financial instrument.
Another thing I hate about mutual funds is that they are advertisement driven. Some of the best and undervalued instruments like Index Funds, closed ended Mutual funds (which trade at 20% discount) are never talked about because they do not pay the journalists.

3rdly I feel the entry/exit load (1.5%), the Asset Management fees (2.5% p.a.) are too high.
4thly All mutual funds advertise their fancy investment ideas, but ultimately boil down to a strong correlation with the sensex. When markets fall they bleed, when they rise they mint gold. I am yet to find even a single sectorial or niche fund (with an investment of >100cr) which has beated the Sensex consistently for over 5years.

Also there are some ridiculous concepts creeping up
1. Basket of Funds:
If your mutual fund is not doing good enough then pay to another manager who will manage him… Just like Inspector raj one inspector to oversee the working of another.
Why Mutual fund:
1.Fund Manager for the poor:
Not everyone has the risk appetite or the knowledge or time to sit with charts projections and derive an investment strategy.
Minimizes the risks shock and the gambling tendency.
You just have to identify the sector which looks attractive and leave the micro-management to the experts.
Tax breaks:
Long term capital investment and dividends from MF is tax free.
ELSS (equity linked savings scheme) SIP (systematic investment plan) gives you good tax shield.




I here briefly intend to discuss the significance of P/E (Price Earning) ratio.

Traditionally PE ratio means the division of the Profits (earning) of a company by its price. If you expect the rate of return of 10% then a stock with PE ratio of <10 should be a good buy.
Things that can alter the PE ratio calculation:

  1. Sunshine Industry:

People do not mind paying high premium to Industries like IT, Pharma, logistics which have high growth potential. Next year the revenue might be much higher and so will be the return prospectus.

  1. Change in Management.

The balance sheets of privatized companies, merged/acquired companies usually take some time before it gets reflected as profits.

  1. Other income.

Beware of the concept of other income. Which usually arises from one time sale of land/ machinery/assets or financial jugglery. It is a one time income and is no reflection of the strength of the company.

  1. Management.

A good promoter and management often command a premium because of the underlying track record and trust.

  1. Policy changes

Often changes in global scenario lead to opening on newer opportunities and companies can expect a boom.

  1. Interest Rates/ Taxation:

An interest rate of 6% means a PE of 16 is attractive, but a interest rate of 7% means PE has to be at most 14.

Humor Photography

Proof of global warming


what i really want to do today

let me know if any of you guys also feel the same


Honda accord amazing advertizement


midnight crisis

A man and his wife are awakened, at 3 o’clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door.
The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
“Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3 o’clock in the morning!
He slams the door and returns to bed.

“Who was that?” asked his wife.
“Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers.
“Did you help him?” she asks.
“No, I did not, it is 3 o’clock in the morning and it is pouring out there!”
“Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember, about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us?
I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!”

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain.

He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?”
“Yes” comes back the answer.
“Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband.
“Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark.
“Where are you?” asks the husband.
“Over here on the swing!” replies the drunk.


aerobics classes

Two women were talking. “I’m so out of shape. I’ve got to start exercising.”
The other said, “I know the feeling. I signed up for an aerobics class and I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped, and perspired for almost an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, my class was over!”

“Dear son,
I’ve got another question about my new computer. How do I take a movie I recorded off of cable TV, fax it from my VCR to my CD-ROM drive so I can email it to my brother’s cell phone so he can make a copy on his camcorder?
Love, Dad.”


Hitch Hiking

This happened about a month ago near Lonavala.

A guy was driving from Mumbai to Pune and decided not to take the new expressway as he wants to see the scenery. The inevitable happens and when he reaches the ghats his car breaks down
– he’s stranded miles from nowhere.

Having no choice he starts walking on the side of the road, hoping to get a lift to the nearest town. It’s dark and raining. And pretty soon he’s wet and shivering. The night rolls on and no car goes by, the rain is so heavy he can hardly see a few feet ahead of him.

Suddenly he sees a car coming towards him. It slows and then stops next to him – without thinking the guy opens the door and jumps in.

Seated in the back, he leans forward to thank the person who had saved him – when he realizes there is nobody behind the wheel!!!

Even though there’s no one in the front seat and no sound of any engine, the car starts moving slowly. The guy looks at the road ahead and sees a curve coming.

Scared almost to death he starts to pray, begging the Lord for his life.
He hasn’t come out of shock, when just before he hits the curve, a hand appears through the window and moves the wheel!

The car makes the curve safely and continues on the road to the next bend. The guy, now paralyzed in terror, watches how the hand appears every time they are before a curve and moves the steering wheel just enough to get the car around each bend.

Finally, the guy sees lights ahead. Gathering his courage he wrenches open the door of the silent, slowly moving car, scrambles out and runs as hard as he can towards the lights. It’s a small town.

He stumbles into a dhaba, and asks for a drink, and breaks down. Then he starts talking about the horrible experience he’s just been through.

There is dead silence in the dhaba when he stops talking …..

…and that’s when Santa and Banta Singh walk into the dhaba. Santa points and says “Look Banta – that’s the weird guy who got into our car when we were pushing it.”


Why invest in stock markets?

Well govt. of India is trying hard to woo people into investing in Indian stock market.

1) They are the only long term viable way of beating the inflation.
2) Help raise funds for good investments and sunrise industry.
3) Investors are the best person to punish, reward and evaluate Management and promoters of the company.
4) A well developed stock market is a must for the much needed entrepreneur boom in the market.
5) Stock market valuation is considered the best guideline in case of takeover, mergers and acquisitions.
6) It promotes, transparency, ethics and sharing of wealth with the general public.

7) Lastly, since betting and gambling is not permitted in India, it provides a healthy avenue for the speculators and risk takers to contribute to the society.


Some more management lessons

Management Lesson #1:
A rabbit asked an eagle resting in a tree, “Can I sit like you and do nothing?” The eagle answered, “Sure, why not?” So the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. Suddenly, a fox appeared, pounced on the rabbit, and ate it.
The Lesson? To sit and do nothing, you must be sitting very, very high.

Management Lesson #2:
A turkey said to a bull, “I would love to perch in the top of that tree but I haven’t the energy.” The bull replied, “Why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings? They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. A day later, after eating more dung, he got to the second branch. Finally, after several days of this diet, he finally made it to the top of the tree, only to be shot by a farmer.
The Lesson? Bullsh¡t might get you to the top, but it can’t keep you there.

Management Lesson #3:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
The Lesson? Not everyone who sh¡ts on you is your enemy, not everyone who gets you out of sh¡t is your friend, and, when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!