control obsessed RBI

While reading this wonderful editorial by Ila Patnaik,

Who stops banks from serving the aam aadmi? More than unions, it’s control-obsessed RBI. And banks love it

A few more questions popped into my head.
1. Why do banks advertise higher interest rates for Senior Citizens and NRI?
Shouldn’t the terms on a Fixed deposit be uniform? Or the government knows that at old age there is a memory loss and a large percentage of the funds collected under old age scheme shall never be refunded.


Bluetooth Headsets

Here is why I hate people hooked to their Bluetooth headsets

And a very funny advertisement depicting a guys worst nightmare

PS: for the benefit of the readers on dialup. I do not embed the video.. instead provide u with the link


Reverse Life

I want to live my next life backwards.
You start out dead and get that out of the way.
Then you wake up in an old age home feeling better & better every day.
You finally get kicked out for being too healthy;
go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day!
You work 40 years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You drink alcohol, you party, and you’re generally promiscuous as you get ready for high school.
You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a baby, and then….
You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions; central heating, room service on tap, larger quarters every day, and THEN…. You finish off as an orgasm.

News Thoughts

Indian Radars

Isn’t it amazing that the crudest home-made micro-light aircrafts can enter the airspace undetected, attack the airbase and return unchallenged. What further amazes me that this was Sri-Lanka’s main airbase, which housed state of the art Israeli built Kfirs and Ukrainian MIG 27s and the raiders made no attempts to mask themselves are a friendly vehicle.
Why were the anti-aircraft gun unable to shoot them down?

How is it possible?

For those who do not know, India is a military adviser for the Sri-Lankan Air force. And only a few months ago, we supplied this airport with latest Indian made Radar Systems (Indra-II). Since they were worth junk… India installed them for free and no doubt the failed miserably and caused such a great international embarrassment.

My question is:
Why does India even bother spending billions of dollars in developing these antique pieces of junk? And worse still gift them (yes, most of our armament exports are as gifts to 3rd world countries who cannot pay rather than a real purchase) to countries where it fails and creates an international embarrassment.


Simple questions, tough answers

Society has become so complicated these days that its best not to ask any personal questions. Why?

1. How many kids to you have?
Last weekend, I met this interesting British fellow. He said: “From my first marriage, I have 2 kids (one of which did not survive). My second wife has 2 kids. 1 from a previous marriage and another which I have fathered.”
After this, in a friendly way, he threw back the question to me: “Now you tell me what should I answer? Whenever someone asks this question, I am perplexed should I answer him the number of kids I have fathered, or the number of kids I provide for, or the number of surviving kids?”

2. Where do you belong to?
My forefathers come from a region which I have never visited. My grandparents build their house in a second state, where I have lived only for a year. My father build one in a third city, where I have never spend more than 10 days. My education was done in 9 different schools across 5 different states and the longest period I have stayed in one place was during my Under graduation. So to which part of the country do I belong to?

Is there a simple question in your life to which you have no answers?


Funny Answers Written By Students

Funny Answers Written By Students

These are answers, some students have written in their exams…

A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go.

The tides are a fight between the Earth and Moon.
All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

When you breathe, you inspire. When you do not breathe, you expire.

Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil.

Clouds are high flying fogs.

I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing.

Clouds just keep circling the earth around and around and around. There is not much else to do.

Cyanide is so poisonous that one drop of it on a dogs tongue will kill the strongest man.

Thunder is a rich source of loudness.

“Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.”

“H20 is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.”

“Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes, and caterpillars.”

“Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.”

“The body consists of three parts – the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five – a, e, i, o and u.”

“The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana.”

“Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa.”

“Germinate: To become a naturalized German.”

“To keep milk from turning sour: keep it in the cow.”


Things My Mother Taught Me

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning”
2. My mother taught me RELIGION. “You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me LOGIC ” Because I said so, that’s why.”
4. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. “If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”
5. My mother taught me IRONY. “Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
6. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.”Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
7. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM “Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
8. My mother taught me about STAMINA. “You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
9. My mother taught me about WEATHER. “This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
10. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. “If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”
11. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE “I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
12. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. “Stop acting like your father!”
13. My mother taught me about ENVY. “There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”
14. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION “Just wait until we get home.”
15. My mother taught me about RECEIVING “You are going to get it when you get home!”
16. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE .”If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.”
17. My mother taught me ESP. “Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”
18. My mother taught me HUMOR. “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me”
19. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. “If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”
20. My mother taught me GENETICS. “You’re just like your father.”
21. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. “Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
22. My mother taught me about WISDOM. “When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”
And my favorite:
23. My mother taught me about JUSTICE “One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you


Calvin learns the meaning of peck



Mamata Banerjee, a fitness freak, finally had a small victory in West Bengal.

But this made me ask myself 2 questions.

1) Why on earth is the Government buying land and giving it away to industrialists free of cost?
2) Do we actually need SEZ? What is so special about SEZ?

I feel SEZ is nothing more than a massive scam. It is a nexus between the politicians and Businessmen to skim the government of billions of Rupees.
Why I think so?

1) Why can’t industry buy land for itself? Government can never pay a fair price…. it will either underpay (for which it is already taking the blame) or it will over pay (in which case government will have to subsidize the land when it resells it to the business.) Why should the government burn its fingers in a land deal? Also I see giving land free to industrial houses as a massive transfer of wealth from poor to the rich.

2) What is the size of a typical SEZ… a few tens of hectares???? Do you guys seriously believe that a few 100 people manufacturing something (which is not state of the art/latest technology) on this tiny spec of land can really transform the entire country? And if it cannot, then lets not waste our time on this trivial activity and concentrate on bigger issues.

3) Just look at the industrial cities of the country. eg: Jamshedpur is the pride of India…. It is the seat of one of the world largest Steel producer, an international automobile manufacturer. But in the past 60 years has it been able to bring even Jharkhand/Bihar out of poverty? Then how can I believe in a SEZ which is not even 1/10 of the size of this Industrial city?
If the government is really serious in giving a big boost to the industry, then mark an entire district or even a region/state as a SEZ. Do not give tax breaks, instead give an assurance that all taxes will be reused in developing the infrastructure of the region.

4) I was looking at the location of the SEZ, almost all of then are already connection by at least 2 of the 3: a national highway, a port and railways. Won’t it be better if you give tax holidays in regions which do not have any industry/infrastructure. So that there is an all inclusive growth of the nation? Why does the government move these Special Economic Zones to the most backward regions of the nation?

5) An island of prosperity in a sea of poverty: This is what SEZ has meant in China and rest of Asia…. They have become a state within a state… have special laws, rules and regulations…. the work permit is almost as hard to get as getting a US VISA. Does India want that?

6) What is so special/different about SEZ?…. Its the labor laws and the tax breaks. Lets discard Tax breaks, because a large portion of what the industry will save will actually end up in the pockets of politicians and Foreign investors and lets talk about Labor Laws. If everybody in the country agrees that they are outdated and are a problem… then change them. 3 years into the industry I learned only one thing: “If you see a problem, fix it ASAP. A work around will only bite you back in your ass” By creating special laws for SEZ, government is only creating a disparity between a worker outside the SEZ and someone in the SEZ.

7) What does an export oriented manufacturing industry require?
a) Uninterrupted power supply.
b) A port (air/sea) from which it can export goods and import raw materials.
“A chain is only as strong as the weakest link” Simple laws of economics say…. If you want to spur the economic growth, then invest in removing the bottlenecks and weak spots.
Does anybody know of a state which can say than in the next 10 years we will provide uninterrupted supply of electricity?
Or a Sea port/ Airport which is capable of handling all the traffic it gets?
Invest in these 2 areas and everything else will fall in place.

Productivity (of both land and labor) is higher in an factory as compared to farming. So building up of industry over farm land is not only inevitable, but also desirable (in certain aspects)
So I see the opposition arguments as: why should farmers make a killing by selling land, they should be allowed to live in eternal penury.

All said and done… please do not force the farmers to own shares against their land they give up. Nobody can predict the share market/future, and it will be really harsh if these poor souls loose not only their land, but also their savings. Give them employment, alternate land or just cash.

UPDATE: Today on 6th April Government finally mandated that its the onus of the SEZ developers and Industrialists to acquire the land for their own use.


Air Dhakkan

Ever wondered that 1/- airline ticket costs me 1200/-?
Why a 300/- dish at a 5 star costs me 400/- while a 10/- dish at a small restaurant/dhabba still costs me 10/.

At first glance, I really felt sorry for Captain G R Gopinath. I felt we are back in 70s where a common man had to pay 97% of his Income as taxes. Air Deccan is trying to enable the masses by selling them flight tickets at 1/- and my corrupt government is punishing it by levying it a 1000/- rupees fine. So I read the fine prints…… and actually felt cheated.

Here is the breakup of the airline ticket.

ticket breakup

Mind you, no part of the fuel surcharge, web consumer fee etc. goes to the government.

I am a simple Man who hates convoluted and complicated things. I could never understand the concept of
* conditions apply
* hidden charges and taxes extra

If you are selling me something, tell me clearly how much you intend to charge for it. Please be a bit more honest and do not indulge in marketing gimmicks.