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Basic Courtesy

We went to a resort on the weekend and one acquaintance of mine had a wardrobe Malfunction. Since I always pack a set of spare overalls when on any day long outdoor activity, I loaned him my pair of shorts. What infuriated me is that when after 2 days I asked him for my shorts, he returned them in the soiled condition. Whats worse, he did not even had the common sense to fold it and put it inside a polythene cover or wrap it in a piece of old newspaper.

Cleaning the shorts is not a big effort, but since I do not know who this guy is, I would see this action as a reflection of his upbringing and mannerism. Had he been a close friend, I would have mocked and taunted his actions so that this never gets repeated.

Indian parents treat their kids like little emperors and don’t even spend a day training them how to behave in public and in social situations. Even after graduating from college and spending years in professional life, most people do not know how to behave and talk in front of girls. That it is rude to stare.

 

street, Bengaluru South, Karnataka, India

14 replies on “Basic Courtesy”

Yes, Indians need to inculcate a basic sense of courtesy in their day to day dealings, though I am not very sure how particular foreigners are about these things 😉

yes very true,
the other day i had loaned my shorts to a friend who is our watchmans son when we were going to a beach
He had more decency and kept asking me do i get it washed, though i declined as i had also my sandy beach clothes – but overall it is the thought that matters

i fully agree on the spoilt brat thing
indians spoil their kids rotten
luckily all my friends are well grounded

…and to add insult to injury, we are the ones who end up at the receiving end with questions like:

” Why are you so finicky?”

” You are a stickler ”

The only thing we can do, is to bear this incident in mind and make sure that our children do not end up this way.

Parents treating their children as emperors is a new concept. It was unknown about a generation ago.

And yes, it is uncultured to stare.

Voracious Blog Reader

@prax…
ur lucky, most people I meet (including myself) need some training on etiquettes. esp the ones which were single kids born in nuclear families.

@vbr….
//we are the ones who end up at the receiving end with questions like//
i totally agree many people think that manners is just a play of words… although it is partly true, but what manners show is that how considerate one is to other person’s feelings.

//It was unknown about a generation ago.//
i would contest that.. boys were always pampered and they were always a little rough around the edges.

//And yes, it is uncultured to stare.//
i wonder if there is anything that a girl can do to send the message across.

I don’t know whether we can generalize that Indian parents treat their children as emperors.Actually i think it depends on parents n their own upbringing…….how can we expect them to correct kids when they themselves lack basic mannerism……but i do agree that these days due to the increasing system of nuclear families where both parents are working, children are not taught basic etiquettes……….I think now its time for parents to drop their mad race for money n start paying more attention to the upbringing of their kids……n staring is highly ill mannered, u feel so embarrased( especially when u can’t make out why d guy is staring at u ):(…….

//when u can’t make out why d guy is staring at u//
well isn’t it obvious: u look so beautiful, that the guy is dumbstruck.

//I think now its time for parents to drop their mad race for money n start paying more attention to the upbringing of their kids//
i guess these days the kids see more of their grandparents (who actually bring them up) than their parents… but u cannot entirely blame the parents for that… the EMI payment usually gobbles up more than half of their income and its almost impossible to make ones end meet with one income.

oh…….its not that obvious ………
Well these days ppl want to earn much more than they require …….don’t u feel these days we work 24*7and then spend lavishly to ease our tensions……is it right? why do we want our kids to hv the most expensive clothes, stationary, games,toys etc.,that every weekend they shud b taken to shopping malls,cineplexes,playstations etc.?????? can’t we go to sm peaceful and entertaining places where they’ll actually get to grow ……i feel even a normal job is sufficient to make the ends meet till u control ur extra expenses…….this way even kids will get to become better human beings n ur life will also become happier ……..i know it is not as easy as it seems but we can try to make things better for a better tomorrow……..
also i agree that d kids do spend most of their time with their grandparents but wat is this ‘most’? ……i don’t think they get real quality time becoz of their busy n competitive schedule …… even grandparents find it difficult to maintain a balance between the modern life n their own style of living……so how can they decide wat teachings shud they give to d kids…..n temme how many parents will lv their kids totally to their parents without complaining abt every small change they want to bring in d kids ????? “arey dad u don’t understand today’s world is like this only ……don’t blow ur own trumpet,ur time is gone” r d common dialogues……
well seriously speaking i don’t know much in this regard but i have to give my opinion on everythng :)……correct me if i m wrong 🙂

//.don’t u feel these days we work 24*7and then spend lavishly to ease our tensions//
well unlike our parents today we people today have much more money to spend… i remember how my parents and grandparents have to keep a tab on how every money was earned and spend…. while we just don’t care.

//why do we want our kids to hv the most expensive clothes,//
well isn’t it natural to see yourself in your kids… give them all the pleasures, gifts and goodies which we could never have….
man r u a philosopher or do u live with one?

//“arey dad u don’t understand today’s world is like this only ……don’t blow ur own trumpet,ur time is gone” r d common dialogues……//
:(( looks like I am also outdated… i never said these words to my folks

oops …….i don’t think u got my point….i just meant these days we work extra to b able to spent ‘EXTRA’ which is not necessary…….due to this extra work we r not able to live a quality time …….when we don’t, how can we expect our kids to hv it? when u don’t interect much with ur frnds n relatives (i mean physically n emotionally n not just through mails……..), how will our kids learn the basic etiquettes n rules of living in a society????????
//“arey dad u don’t understand today’s world is like this only ……don’t blow ur own trumpet,ur time is gone” r d common dialogues……//
n that was meant to b said by d parents to their parents whenever they try to make kids do things their own way ……..n i don’t think u r in that category now (so don’t wry 🙂 )
//man r u a philosopher or do u live with one?
was that meant for me? if it is then – neither i m a philosopher nor i m living with one …….i m one of d coolest girl out here but i can switch on to philosophy ny time……d greatest regret is that mostly it ends up being called ‘fart’ 🙁 ……ppl usually don’t agree to my point of view (sob …….sob) 🙁

//when u don’t interect much with ur frnds n relatives (i mean physically n emotionally n not just through mails……..), how will our kids learn the basic etiquettes n rules of living in a society????????//
i know its the curse of nuclear family.. nobody has time for anybody else and people just don’t get along.

//.n i don’t think u r in that category now (so don’t wry 🙂 )//
thank god.. recently a couple of people proved that i am cold hearted and insensitive.. and now i thought u were implying that i am old fashioned and orthodox.. i was getting scared 🙁

//ppl usually don’t agree to my point of view (sob …….sob) //
so u r a philosopher in making. IIT campus is a great place to debate and hone your skills. i am sure the 4 years would turn you into a fine spokesperson

//i am sure the 4 years would turn you into a fine spokesperson
i hope so…..i really wanna b one ……n thanks for believing that i can b one …….:)

hey..i did not log on to ur blog for long so late comment…it must have been a tough time for you considering you wash ur own cloth 😉 …

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