Some employee performance evaluations.
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“Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom
& has started to dig.”
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“Works well when under constant supervision
& when cornered like a rat in a trap.”
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“This young lady has delusions of adequacy.”
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“He sets low personal standards & then
consistently fails to achieve them.”
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“This employee should go far,
& the sooner he starts, the better.”
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“He would argue with a signpost.”
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“He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room.”
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“A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.”
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“If he were any more stupid,
he’d have to be watered twice a week.”
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“If you give him a penny for his thoughts,
you’d get change.”
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“Some drink from the fountain of knowledge;
he only gargled.”
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